Christmas Break

Christmas break is a beautiful thing.  After weeks of parties (literally, I had 2 weeks where we packed in 5 parties - Christmas, goodbye, birthday, another Christmas and marble party - along with 2 birthday parties outside of school) and crazy kids and crazy teachers and creativity gone wild, it's nice to have a break.

My Christmas was spent in 2 places.  Christmas Eve was spent with my roommate and 2 friends (Hannah and Austin - a couple with UWM) at our friends' house (the Hollowells - UWM Area director with his wife and 4 children).  Tiffany and I spent Christmas Eve with them last year as well.  We had appetizers and then played games and then had dinner and then talked about advent and spent some time reflecting on the "holes" in our life that Christ desires to redeem in order to let His light shine through us.  It was really beautiful.  So it was nice, getting to spend Christmas Eve with friends that I truly love and enjoy.

That night, Diana and I dragged our mattresses downstairs and slept by the Christmas tree!  It was really fun!  We also both bought each other pajamas and opened them that night so that we could sleep in them.

Christmas morning we woke up and exchanged gifts before preparing breakfast and then heading over to Austin and Hannah's for Christmas brunch.  We exchanged gifts with them and then watched Meet Me in St. Louis.  Then, we came back home to nap, shower, and prepare for our Christmas feast.  At 5 PM, we went back to Hannah and Austin's for Christmas dinner.  Then we played some games (Boggle - which I won, True Colors, and Farkle - which I lost very badly in).  You know, Christmas away from home is a hard thing for me.  As stressful and crazy as the holiday season can be, I always enjoy spending time with my family whether we're playing games, sitting around talking, or yelling at a football game on TV - it's something that I cherish and look forward to, so being away from it is a painful thing.  But, I will say this, if I couldn't be with my real family, it was wonderful to be with three of the people who have become like family.  I really enjoy Austin, and Hannah and Diana have journeyed with me and encouraged me in some difficult things.

As I reflect on this Christmas, especially in comparison to where I was emotionally last year, I see so clearly God's blessing.  He has expressed His love to me in so many tangible ways over the last year.  With friends, with circumstances, with the undeniable reality that He called me to Him and as I drew near, He drew near to me.  It hasn't been easy...it's been downright painful at times (and even now, as He has given me an easy burden as far as living situation, class time, enjoyment of my daily life, He prods at my heart revealing far uglier things than I ever wanted to admit were there) but He has shown Himself to be loving, tender, compassionate, and powerful.

Word of Advice: Do not let students play with your camera unsupervised

With 3 of my girls at the Christmas concert

With one of my students from last year

My kids are so adorable!

Elementary Christmas Party - Make a snowman race

Lili 

The Elementary teachers had a door decorating contest.  We won "Funniest"

Diana and me outside of the Operahaz with the giant Nutcracker

Our class Christmas party - the kids wanted to play chess.  No wonder they are such good problem solvers!

At the Budapest Christmas Market with two of my friends

Mentünk Prágába

This last weekend was a three day weekend.  Hungary celebrates Nov 1 - All Soul's Day.

Diana and I decided that we wanted to get out of Diosd for the weekend.  So we e-mailed our friends in Prague to ask if we could crash on their couch, boarded a train, and 7 hours later, we were walking around the beautiful city of Prague, Czech Republic.

Prague is considered one of the most beautiful cities in Europe, and I understand why.  We were only there for one full day and even though it was rainy most of the time, it was still strikingly beautiful.

We spent most of the time walking around the Old Town, looking at the cathedral in the distance, visiting the Lennon wall, and enjoying the view from the palace wall.  

One of the only working (possibly the only working) astronomical clocks

Walking over the Charles Bridge at night

Approaching the Castle

We caught it at the end of Fall...doesn't mean there weren't stunning colors

Prague skyline

National Museum

We walked over the bridge again during the day

The bridge is lined with beautiful statues - I got lucky and got one without a person standing in the shot.  Also, the sun came out for a bit!

Found another lock bridge on the way to the Lennon Wall

One of the first churches (I think...my feet were hurting pretty badly by this point in the tour - might not have been paying the best attention)

Waiting for the clock to chime 10 AM in the rain

Popular shopping area leading up to the Museum

In a courtyard of the castle

View of the cathedral from the palace walls

Fun trip with this girl

"We all live in a yellow submarine"

The city and the river at dusk

It was a welcome break from the hustle and bustle of daily life.  We were very thankful to our friends for letting us stay with them and for showing us around.

I hope I get to go back some time...perhaps in the Spring so that I can see this place when it's blooming!

Full of Praise

Jesus is good.

This is not a new revelation.  It would be ridiculous of me to have experienced what I have of Him and not know that. 

But this week two of my students asked to pray with me so that they could ask Jesus to forgive their sins and be their Savior and Lord forever.  Another student told me that after we talked about it in class, she went home and prayed to Jesus herself.  

And I am blown away.

The past year has held many lessons for me but one theme has shown up through it all.  Jesus is in pursuit of my heart.  He's not interested in all of the "good Christian" things I do.  He wants my heart and He has been pursuing it for far longer than I realized (and probably longer than I currently realize).  He has worked relationships, broken relationships, hurts, desires, unfulfilled dreams, and an unexpected calling all together to capture my heart.

As refreshing and revolutionary and life-giving as this realization has been, I am now amazed at His pursuit of the hearts of my students.  It's not that I didn't see it before...or didn't know it before...but to be shown it with such clarity this week...man, He Is Good.

Just think: these kids may or may not be from believing families.  God had to work out for these kids' families to hear about ICSB and to hear good enough things about it that they decided against sending their children to Hungarian school or any the other American/English schools in favor of the American run Christian school.  These kids have been hearing Bible stories and the Truth of God's love for them and Jesus' sacrifice and free gift of salvation from their Pre-1st, 1st, 2nd, and 3rd grade teachers and now from me.  This summer, as I was thinking through what I would do this school year, I felt so strongly that God wanted me to change how I do devotions - that rather than having prayer/prayer request time, I should do a more formal devotion with them.  And more than that, to focus heavily on the Gospel at the beginning of the year.  To really emphasize that our salvation doesn't come from going to church or from whether or not our families are Christian but that it's a decision we have to make for ourselves.  And still, all of this could have taken place and none of it would make a lick of difference if He had not been working on their hearts, softening them and opening their eyes and ears to His Truth.

But He did.  He wants their hearts just as much as He wants mine and the whole world's.  He's been chasing after them, and I am just so thankful to have been a part of His work.

And I have two new sisters in Christ and a new brother in Christ.

Year Two Begins

Year two in Hungary is in full bloom.  I've finished two and a half weeks of school, moved into my house, made multiple IKEA trips, completely furnished an unfurnished house, and hung out downtown for a national holiday.

It's been a bit of a whirlwind, to be completely honest.  This weekend is our staff retreat and while there is work to be done, at least I'm being forced to sit down and breathe a little bit.  Diana and I went on a walk this afternoon where we talked about a lot of the emotions that have been running rampant the last few weeks.  

Truthfully, I'm not really sure what to write about, I just thought you all might enjoy some pictures of my new class!

3rd, 4th, and 5th graders playing soccer at recess

Some kids are always more aware of when I have the camera out

2 of my sweet girls

Getting ready for skits about showing real joy in hard circumstances - the were Paul and Silas in jail

Skits - these two were nerds and mean boys came and knocked their books on the ground.  They ended up forgiving them and becoming friends.

With my friend, Laura, downtown on St. Istvan's Day.  We were waiting for the fireworks and I was fighting off jet lag.

The castle and Chain bridge on St. Istvan's Day

Szabadsag Hid 

Had a lot of help moving our refrigerator.  Saw some interesting methods.

Looking into our house from the hallway in the entrance

"New" dining room table and buffet

The pink couch in our living room - we still need something to put the TV on.

Full class - what a fun bunch!

Personally, it's interesting to see what God is doing in my life and what He's showing me.  There are a couple of insecurities that have been a part of my life for a long time, but it feels like over the past few years, God has brought it to light more and more often.  And I've realized that it's a prominent thing in a lot of my relationships - a need to be "the favorite."  And it's more than just a damaging thing in my relationships with people but also in my relationship with God.  So, I think that this is going to be a major thread in my life for the upcoming months.  I'll keep you updated :)

Starting Year 2

I am currently sitting in a restaurant in the Minneapolis airport, serving the first of my lay overs.  I can't believe the summer is over already.  It felt surreal coming back to America after a year in Budapest and now it feels surreal returning.  Did I really live in another country?  Did I actually live a life so completely different from the life that I have in Texas?

The last couple of days have been very difficult for me for a number of reasons.

1) I hate flying - Though it's never been my favorite thing, I could tolerate it.  I might even look forward to the hours of solitude and quiet that I got to read or write or sleep.  Now, thanks to a couple of horrendous flying experiences, I am a big wad of nerves and anxiety.  If I could just be in Budapest without all of the flying, I would be much happier.  But, the crippling anxiety that I can't control or logically think my way out of leads me to the only source of true peace, Jesus.  I've spent many a sleepless night praying, remembering verses where God tells me not to fear and that He is my protection and fortress.  He reminds me that He is sovereign.  He holds the whole world in His hands.  I have zero control over what happens or doesn't happen on my flight, but He does.  And He loves me.  And I have to trust that no matter what, He has my best interest at heart.

2) I hate saying goodbye.  I was thankful this year that God granted me the ability to enjoy each moment with the people I loved rather than dwelling on the fact that I was leaving in a matter of weeks.  But last night and then this morning, I was a mess of emotions.  I hate the pain that I'm in...there's no way around that.  Leaving the people and the home and the church that I love is not an easy thing.  But I've realized, after 2 summers of goodbyes and 1 year of loneliness, that I deeply value relationships.  The things that were hard about moving to Hungary weren't the different culture or the lack of sunshine in the winter, it was the lack of deep relationships.  And the thing that God provided that helped me to begin enjoying myself in Hungary was deep, meaningful relationships with Himself and others.

As I reflected on the end of the school year with my class and how painful it was for me to say goodbye to them, I remember thinking, "It's a good thing that it hurts so much.  It means that it was something good...something worth being sad that it's over."  That's true in this case as well.  It hurts something fierce saying goodbye to my parents and my friends.  Many tears have been shed and in all likelihood, more will be shed too.  But it's good.  It means that the relationships I'm leaving meant something.  It means that these people are an irreplaceable part of me so that leaving hurts.  It hurts in the moment but if it didn't hurt, the relationships likely wouldn't be worth having or investing in.

That being said, I have some wonderful relationships in Budapest that would hurt just as much if I left them.

I am sad to go, but I am thrilled to return.  It is as if my heart is permanently ripped in two.  I get a big smile on my face when I think about the person picking me up and the people helping me move.  I can't wait to get into my classroom and set it up for my new class.  I can't wait for the first time I get to see my class from last year.  I even...get this, this is how you know I am genuinely excited...I even got a little excited reading our itinerary for in-service.

As I've struggled this summer (and last year), torn between loving being in Hungary and longing for home, I realized (and continue to realize) that Jesus tells us to pick up our cross daily for a reason.  Some days are easier than others.  Some days surrendering my Texas life feels simple.  I am happy in Hungary with my Hungary friends and my Hungary job and doing the work that God called me to - sure I miss my friends and family, but I'm happy.  Other days all I want to do is jump on a plane and head home and hug every single person that I love.  But Christ called me to this, and I have to die to myself and my wants and desires and joyfully surrender to Him and His will for me.  (Easier said than done, am I right?)  It's easy to focus on what I've "lost" or "given up" and lose sight of what I gain.  I gain Christ.  I gain a deeper relationship with Him that is more important than anything else.  Sometimes it hurts, but that's often when I feel His tender presence most acutely.

4th of July

As the 4th approached, I remembered what some of the other teachers had said at the beginning of last year.  They had commented about how strange it was to celebrate Independence Day and hear the anthem after a year of living in another country.  With that in mind, I was preparing myself for a different 4th experience.

I shouldn't have bothered.  I can understand what they felt, but for me, being in Hungary didn't change a thing.  If anything, it made me more grateful for the afternoon I got to spend with my dad and little sister.  I still felt that swell of pride as the Star Spangled Banner played; still fully enjoyed sitting in the heat munching on a hot dog; still loved watching Jadyn get her face painted with red, white and blue stars; still stared in wonder as the fireworks exploded overhead.  Don't get me wrong, I loved being in Hungary.  I love how beautiful Budapest is and the different things that it has to offer.  But I completely loved being able to sit back and enjoy a fully American holiday.

I always liked July 4th, but it never felt like a super important holiday to me.  I love that as a country we recognize and celebrate our freedom and give thanks to the people who fought for that freedom, but the holidays that always meant the most to me were the ones where I got to spend significant amounts of time with family: Christmas, New Years, Thanksgiving, Easter.  But it had new significance for me this year.  I loved getting to celebrate America and being American this year.

Vacation to Greece

The school year ended in a bit of a blur which I will expand upon later.  After the madness that was school in May and the emotional distress of saying goodbye to my students and some of my colleagues and friends, I was blessed to get to visit Greece with 2 of my best friends from college.  They were celebrating their 5th anniversary in Greece and I flew down to join them for 3 days in Crete, 3 days in Santorini, and 4 days in Athens.

It was great to have a relaxing time away to reflect and get caught up on my sleep!  Of course, it was wonderful to get to spend time with Jim and Amanda.  Also, Greece is one of the places that I have always wanted to visit and I spent some time just being thankful that God orchestrated things so that I got to enjoy the first few weeks of summer there.  It was so beautiful!  

Stop #1 - Crete

Flying over Athens - A huge city of 5 million people

The view from our top floor apartment

The first day we rented a car and drove through the mountains across the island

We visited a monastery on our way to the beach one day

We hiked a kilometer down to the beach - really pretty going down, really steep going back up

All beaches had taverns or snack bars.  It was quite convenient

Sunset from our deck

Our landlords made us dinner

And got it to the roof using a basket

We visited Knossos Palace - the inspiration for the myth of the Labyrinth and the Minotaur 

The beach right down the road from our apartment

Everyone at dinner except for our fabulous hostess, Antonia

Stop #2 - Santorini

Santorini was probably my favorite place.  Though all three had something special and unique that I enjoyed, Santorini was the most relaxing.  If you were to close your eyes and picture Greece, you would probably be picturing Santorini. The buildings were white and blue and we were on a thin island so no matter where you were, you could see the Mediterranean.  There were black sand beaches and gorgeous sunsets and crazy drivers.

We stayed in this little cave house which was right  on the edge of a cliff overlooking the water

The view from our deck - this is where I spent an afternoon reading.  Basically, a perfect few hours.

There was this church on the winding path down to our  house.  The path from this door  was a staircase straight down so it looked like a door to nowhere.  I was slightly fascinated with it.

We went for a "short" 6 mile, uphill walk in the heat of the day.  But we saw a lot of really pretty things like this church.

This was the cathedral in Thira, the capital city in Santorini

One evening, we went to the tip of the island where there was an old castle and we joined our fellow tourists in order to watch the sun set over the water.

To pass the time, we made bets on when we thought the sun would set.  I lost fabulously!

A view of Oia at night after dinner

Amanda and me at the beach

Waiting for the sun to set

Stop #3 - Athens

Athens was soooo cool!  It was definitely much more of a big city feel but what I loved was all of the history.  It was incredible to be standing in front of buildings that had been there since before Jesus.  And truthfully, after reading the Percy Jackson books, I got pretty excited any time we heard the name Poseidon or Athena.  It was a strange sensation however, to be looking at these ornate statues of the Greek gods.  I could look at them and admire the craftsmanship, but there were people who once truly believed they were powerful.  We were made to worship, they were just misplacing their worship - giving it to cheap imitations rather than the Living God.

The view of the Acropolis from a hill across from it that we hiked up

The Parthenon - so iconic and so cool

These statues were copies.  We saw the actual statues being restored in the Acropolis Museum

The Olive Tree that Athena supposedly invented for the Athenians in order to win their allegiance

The Temple of Zeus

Olympic stadium

A temple to Hephaestus - the most well preserved ancient building in Athens 

We had to give at least one Gig 'em during our trip ;)

Jim and I sitting in the King and Queen's thrones surveying the Games

I won, of course

Zeus had a huge arm

Poseidon - I was pretty excited to see this